Let me think about this thing called love. I don't know why I believe that I can give you some hints about this topic but I don't care (this time).
If you like a girl (much) and you don't know how she feels, and you think about her and the time with her all the day and you don't get any answer then maybe you plan to meet her (in the real world) or to write here (in the virtual world).
You write her how you feel and how much do you like her and in the end you write three letters - ILD (ich liebe dich, German) or ILU (I love u, English). Maybe she feels the same and everything gets very well.
But if she doesn't feel the same, you lose almost everything - your imagination (that she could be more than a friend for you), your happiness to be with her (because now you know what she really feels) and almost everything else (because everything will get more difficult and more 'what-can-I-do-to-make-her-love-me').
Last time with this special girl (what I described several times here) I promise myself that I will not write to her ILD||ILU. But then I was in such a situation where I felt everything for her and so wrote this three letters. She was/is cool enough to go on as usual and we were/are still very good friend, my luck, I don't want to lose her.
But I would like to give you the general hint: Do not write (in virtual reality at least) ILD||ILU, because if you don't write it you can be happy with the girl, make jokes and have fun. But if you ever wrote this, things will never be the same again, everything changed then. In the worst case you lose her as a very good friend.
So I will never write ILD||ILU if I am not 100% convinced that the girl feels the same and everything will be fine. ...
Do you know this? You have got a conversation with somebody and then he/she does things which you really dislike? I would like to have a try to list some of them (things I dislike). :-)
This list is not sorted by importance.
If you ever have got a conversation/discussion with me, please don't think that I don't have any kind of humor. ;-) The sky isn't only blue and I am tolerant enough to everybody and everything.
It's an (un)usual friday evening (^Wnight) today. I sit here, watch at my ICQ contact list and wonder where all the people are, then I remember that it's weekend.
Furthermore I have a look at the website of our local disco, but notice
shortly that there isn't anything interesting for me.
I check out the website of my town, the
list of events, but there is anything
that touches me, too.
So I do my regular walk through the net and searches for some new information. Then is the Wikipedia down - so I cannot figure out currently what "reductio ad absurdum" exactly means. Lovely night.
So I hang a little bit around, read some people, some IRC channels, ... and then go sleeping shortly. Oh my god, I feel the lonliness inside. :-/
One evening in real life...
I saw yesterday an interesting event entry on nordhausen.de about
live music
in one of our streets.
Just because I need some fresh air I went out to the event. It was a lovely evening with some people out there. Nevertheless, the street(s) was almost empty and there was no live music there. Great feeling.
Enough real life for the next week(s). ;-)
Good night everybody!
Hello... this day I've done some of the tests of testreich.com:
Just another useless tests... good night.
I was not available yesterday and some hours today, because my DSL modem lost its DSL signal. It is a Teledat 431 LAN.
While being offline I thought that I can have a try to scan my modem for open ports. I had a look at the handbook and figured out the IP address of it (192.169.212.213). So I scanned my modem with nmap for open TCP and UDP ports. I found only one open FTP (21) port - no telnet - strange.
While beeing back online (because of some miracles), I googled along and found out that there is really an open telnet port. And the only reason why I didn't saw it was that it runs on port 64113 (a private port).
Then you can have a try to connect to your modem via telnet on this port and the password ti3rdd. After it you are able to access the firmware of the modem directly and are able to query it for some information...
It's just an entry about my current feelings and thoughts. I would like to meet this special girl
today to search something eatable or something like that...
But it ends in one big mess. Everything began that yesterday she called me just before our date and said
that she wanted to go with an other girl somewhere - 'Hey, no problem', I thought. She said that
we could meet us today.
We discussed today when we will meet each other and then she asked me if her friend could go with us to the restaurant, too. Generally no problem for me, but if I should driver... and if I wanted to meet a girl, ... I was intollerant enough to said 'no'.
I said to the girl that I am not in mood and wished her a wonderfull afternoon with her friend. But now I feel very bad and thought of something that I could have done in just another way.
My only mistake was still that I liked her too much. But I know that I'll ran into nowhere with my feelings. It'll get too complicated - for a while, there weren't any problems to meet us and have a great night - but now...
Sometimes I think I don't know this girl. But that's real life - and it hurts!
Hello. Maybe I should blog about it, maybe not... I don't know. This entry is about a relationship between me and a really cool girl.
But I cannot figure out what is right or what is wrong. Everything began that somebody I didn't know before (or at least, I didn't know her very well) tried to connect me via mobile phone - and this serveral times... some days later I send her a SMS. I got then an answer of her and the game began...
I didn't know who she was so I asked her several questions, we "fooled" a little bit around some days and tried to get more information about each other - then I figured out that she worked at the same place where I've done my social work. I knew her, but only her styling, her body, ... not her character.
After this, we continued writing mails and SMS and so on... we become really good friends. But I always
asked myself if there isn't something more than a friendship maybe.
We went out to meet eatch other for a very nice (romantic) dinner, to drink something together; we also
went together into the cinema to watch Scarry Movie 4
and something more...
Everybody else out there could thought that we felt in love, but the only answer I got from her of the question if there exist more than only a friendship was: "We will see - the time will show us the way" (or something like that)...
I like her very (very) much, but I don't want to lose her as a friend. You see? It's always not so easy... But what could I do? I don't want to lose her. :-/ ...
Have a nice night and make things better than I - or at least, have a try. :-)
Hello everybody out there reading the blog. I was not available the last days, because of a trip to austria. But now I am back at home, and ready to relax the few days of my holidays. I took some pictures of my trip to austria and you can have a look at them and maybe you enjoy them, too. :-)
Nevertheless, today I think don't blog to much, because I go out later on and meet a very
nice girl... so don't wait too long for a new interesting blog entry. ;-)
But maybe I can tell you later, how I liked Scary Movie...
Have nice day anyway... I will.
See u l8er.
Please notice that I will be not available since 2006-04-17 until
2006-04-22.
If you have any problems with our services on
Nanofortnight - please contact
one of the users on Forkbomb. Thank you.
I will travel to Austria with my family to relax a little bit of the last few months (civil_service--). So have all a great next week and see you back soon! 8-)
Hello everybody out there. Today somebody said to me a really annoying statement.
It was something like:
'Hey man, I know why you talk to this girl only in the virtual world. It's so much easier there and you can say almost everything to her; even things that you cannot say in the real world.'
That's something I really dislike. I think about the virtual world in the same way I think about the real world. Everything I say to somebody in the virtual world, I also could say to him/her in the real world, too. But of course, sometimes the things in virtual life are more agressive, more lovely or too much in general. But the main idea of a sentence is (almost) the same in virtual and in real life.
So I don't make any differences there and I don't like if somebody tells me that
there are differences, because it is wrong...
You cannot hide your personality in virtual life. Be yourself.
Update (two hours later): Sometimes I think I shouldn't post those rubish on my (serious) blog again. It's very personal, and it depends too much on my thoughts in this special moment. So please don't care of everything...
I searched this night for the Hacker Ethics published by the Chaos Computer Club and found this list:
The list can also be found at the CCC site about the Hacker Ethics.
The most important point (of course all points are important) for me is that you shouldn't
judge about a human being because of his/her degrees, age, race, or position.
You should always be tollerant enough to accept other people and their opinions and not
flame them if they don't think the same way you do.
And another point for me is that every life is it worth to be protected. So help
each other and don't think of you like you are the center of our universe.
If somebody will think about this sentenses I will be glade.
And thanks to Melanie, who inspired me to write this blog entry. :-)
Hello everybody.
Today I listened to the podcast show 100 of spreeblick.com and then to the current podcast show.
After it I added a nice panorama of Wellington (New Zeland) on my gallery.
And then I searched the Linux Information Day 2005 (Dresden)
website about the presentation of Meike Reichle about
User motivation or why the BOFH isn't (almost) funny.
Great presentation for every sysadmin who would like to understand his/her users and think about
Meike's speech.
It's a pitty that I was unable to listen to it on the
Chemnitzer Linux Days 2006, because of
the Key Signing Party. :-/
But nevertheless... good night to you.
Hello you, reader of this blog, nice to meet you. ;-)
Today I thought the whole evening about an operating system I could use on my new x86.
And I have got only a few wishes on my lists.
It shouldn't be:
But it should:
So I thought of:
This could be very difficult. FreeBSD is just another *nix distribution, and I don't
want to go on this way...
SchilliX sounds not too bad to me, but if you have got a look at the history, the
development seems to be frozen.
Nexenta OS is a mix of the Debian system (with the GNUtils) and the
OpenSolaris kernel, so you try another
way, but you can keep the whole GNU experience(s).
I think I should give Nexenta OS a try. More news about this topic soon....
Good night.
